Step into iconic couples therapist Esther Perel and listen as real couples anonymously bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their story.  From infidelity, to sexlessness, to loss, it's a space for people to be heard and understood. It's also a place for us to listen and feel empowered in our own relationships. So.. where should we begin?  Season three coming spring 2019.

This week, Esther invites you into a conversation about desire, disruption, and what it means to stay alive to one another in a rapidly changing world.

Recorded live at Sessions Live, Esther is joined by journalist and Head of Content at Esther Perel Global Media, Mary Alice Miller, for a look back on twenty years of Mating in Captivity and explore how our ideas about intimacy, desire, and relationships have evolved. 

Also, just for you, inspired by the anniversary of Mating in Captivity, Esther has also curated a special playlist of Where Should We Begin podcast sessions exploring themes from the book:  https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4d1AeEj4uypRpUnrgv6dlm?si=cIw37dzLTMaoBeagQPi1Cw
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Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

20 Years Later, Esther Revisits Mating in Captivity 

This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? They grew up with traumatic backgrounds, met in college, immigrated to the US together. They've built stability and security, and now one of them longs for more freedom.  

Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a session with Esther for the podcast, it is an act of generosity for everyone who listens. These sessions are meant not only to support the people in the room with Esther, but all of us who learn from their stories. Our stories have many chapters, and what you hear is just one moment in someone’s journey. So even though the sessions are anonymous, please remember that real people are behind them and they may be reading your comments.

Also, please join me on Entre Nous, my new home on Substack for anyone who wants to live, love, and work with more connection and imagination. I invite you to sign up and become a free or paid member at estherperel.substack.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In This Relationship What Is "I" and What is "We"? 

Twin brothers come to Esther with a shared question: how do they break free from the conflict that has shaped their relationship for years? One feels smothered, the other abandoned, and together they are caught in a cycle of pursuit and withdrawal that neither knows how to escape. With Esther, they explore how to loosen the grip of old roles and find each other again, not just as twins, but as two distinct people learning how to stay connected without losing themselves.

Esther Callings are a one time, 45-60 minute interventional phone call with Esther. They are edited for time, clarity, and anonymity. If you have a question you would like to talk through with Esther, send a voice memo to producer@estherperel.com. 

Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a session with Esther for the podcast, it is an act of generosity for everyone who listens. These sessions are meant not only to support the people in the room with Esther, but all of us who learn from their stories. Our stories have many chapters, and what you hear is just one moment in someone’s journey. So even though the sessions are anonymous, please remember that real people are behind them and they may be reading your comments.

Also, please join me on Entre Nous, my new home on Substack for anyone who wants to live, love, and work with more connection and imagination. I invite you to sign up and become a free or paid member at estherperel.substack.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Are You Abandoning Me or Am I Suffocating You?

A recent session was a threshold moment for Esther where she found herself doing couples therapy with a man and his AI companion. To explore the questions it raised, Esther sits down with New York Times technology reporter, Kashmir Hill, who has spent years reporting on the growing world of AI relationships. They explore the psychological pull of these systems, the design choices behind them, and the deeper human needs they tap into. When a chatbot can mirror your thoughts, validate your feelings, and never turn away, where does connection end and illusion begin?  

PLEASE NOTE  The Times sued OpenAI in 2023, accusing it of copyright infringement. The company has denied those claims.

Also, please join me on Entre Nous, my new home on Substack for anyone who wants to live, love, and work with more connection and imagination. I invite you to sign up and become a free or paid member at estherperel.substack.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Love in the Time of AI with Kashmir Hill

With her wedding just weeks away, a young woman calls Esther with a question she’s been carrying for most of her life: how do you allow yourself joy when you’ve learned to make yourself small? Growing up alongside a non-speaking autistic brother taught her to be vigilant, self-effacing, and attuned to everyone else’s needs. Joy and celebration have always come with guilt. As the wedding approaches, those old patterns threaten to keep her on emotional eggshells during one of the most meaningful days of her life. Together, they explore what it means to grow up as the “easy” child, and how claiming space does not betray the people we love.

Esther Callings are a one time, 45-60 minute interventional phone call with Esther. They are edited for time, clarity, and anonymity. If you have a question you would like to talk through with Esther, send a voice memo to producer@estherperel.com. 

Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a session with Esther for the podcast, it is an act of generosity for everyone who listens. These sessions are meant not only to support the people in the room with Esther, but all of us who learn from their stories. Our stories have many chapters, and what you hear is just one moment in someone’s journey. So even though the sessions are anonymous, please remember that real people are behind them and they may be reading your comments.

Also, please join me on Entre Nous, my new home on Substack for anyone who wants to live, love, and work with more connection and imagination. I invite you to sign up and become a free or paid member at estherperel.substack.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

To Make Room for My Brother I Learned to Disappear 

A person gives their partner an ultimatum, and they fail to meet it. What happens then to the relationship? This couple comes to Esther with that question, wondering what future, if any, might be possible for them. A painful misalignment lies at the center of their polyamorous relationship. She wants to be an integrated part of his life, including his other partnerships; he wants to keep his relationships separate and invisible. Tired of feeling like a secret, she finally gave him an ultimatum: make me a visible part of your life. He wouldn't do it, and now they are left wondering if it will be possible to stay together.

Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a session with Esther for the podcast, it is an act of generosity for everyone who listens. These sessions are meant not only to support the people in the room with Esther, but all of us who learn from their stories. Our stories have many chapters, and what you hear is just one moment in someone’s journey. So even though the sessions are anonymous, please remember that real people are behind them and they may be reading your comments.

My annual Sessions Live two-day live event is coming up next month! Through clinical, cultural, and creative perspectives, Sessions Live 2026: Cultivating Aliveness: Desire & Its Disruptions explores how relationships are evolving, and how we can translate those insights into practice. Whether you’re a practicing clinician or curious mind, you’ll discover fresh insights and takeaways to help you connect and thrive. Come see me live on May 15th and 16th in NYC! Podcast listeners get a special discount with the code FRIENDSLIVE to get $100 off an in-person ticket, or FRIENDSVIRTUAL for $50 off a virtual ticket at checkout on the Sessions Live ticket page.

Also, please join me on Entre Nous, my new home on Substack for anyone who wants to live, love, and work with more connection and imagination. I invite you to sign up and become a free or paid member at estherperel.substack.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel